It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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