he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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