Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
