Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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