he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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