You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
