How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Less talking, more tequila
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
