Hey man sorry I got all grabby
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
