Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Randomize
