So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
