He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize