she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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