You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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