The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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