He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
