Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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