I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Randomize
