so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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