And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
