i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
