You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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