i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
