Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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