Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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