just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize