I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Randomize
