Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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