So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
She needs sedatives and a leash
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
last night I used snow as a chaser
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
