I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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