You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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