just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I said "one day" and that day is not today
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
