Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
