This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I wish I only lived at night.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
it glows. i had to have it.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
