Dual....:-)
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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