the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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