Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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