More tranny stories later!
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
