So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
