But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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