But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
