I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize