nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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