Why does Corona taste like a burp?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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