A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
