U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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