it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
