my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
