it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
