Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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