Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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