Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
