I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
