just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
